jazz as well as iwan fals, so what

i have to say that this issue is actually outdate and i wrote this like almost a month ago. why didnt i put this at that time? i dont know exactly…

…… 

“You knew nothing until he introduced you to Jazz!” she shouted. “Don’t act smart, Nisa. You were just another listeners of Iwan Fals before he taught you jazz. And now, you’re boasting about jazz, as if you’re so sophisticated, so elite. Shame on you!”  

Amazed as usual, I could only almost laugh, cynically of course. At one point, she was right. I didn’t interested at all in jazz before I met him and after we had deep constant conversation, debates, and reading about the soul of the music. I had misjudged the music for so long. I thought it was a genre for elitist, the white-collar music. Until I found out that SGA, my favorite author, listened to it and I wonder why. Until we talked about the human rights movement in USA, the freedom expression, the egalitarianism, democracy, and the courage to be ‘one self’. As it takes knowledge and skill to improvise in jazz, it also takes learning to listen and appreciate that, my lady. And yes, I learned from him, I thank him.  

The sad part of her “agony in disguise” (I learned that hatred and anger always be the easiest form of agony and pain) was when she implied … (I know she would say: “I didn’t say that!” I said: Imply; that means you meant to say that. For someone whose major is Language, I believe you know what I am saying)

… “Iwan Fals” as music for the low-level SES (Social Economic Status), which is arguable, and I was such an underdog until he “saved” me to higher level. Haha! 

First, my spirit is on the street, there with so many people whose houses were drawn by flood, whose kids are ill and they couldn’t afford to go to school, whose been abused by their poverty, who doesn’t have any hope because it is too expansive for them. My soul is there as Iwan Fals sang the “Sore Tugu Pancoran” or when the Kantata Takwa (Iwan Fals, Rendra, Djodi, Jabo, …) mentioned about “Orang-orang kalah” and “Kesaksian”. They moved me, remind me of the people who wait for me to contribute, not to help them; for it is my responsibility, not my charity.

I protest, yes I still do, against corruption and the lame government, and Iwan spoke my voice when he sang: “wakil rakyat bukan paduan suara, hanya tahu nyanyian lagu setuju…”. I feel the Paman Doblang’s wisdom. I was shivered when listened to “Sang Petualang” for I knew that I am only a wanderer in this a huge world. So, here I would say that no matter how I listened to jazz and learn about it, I still appreciate Iwan Fals, but mostly only his 80s and early 90s songs, because he’s less ‘alarming’ and kinda too ‘romantic’ right now ^^.

so put a label on me, if you want. but it wont change who i am inside, exactly. i dont mind about label no more, as many secure people do.

Second, if you thought that jazz would make me forgets who I am, then think twice because maybe it was you who couldn’t tell your true color, girl. I was mesmerized by Alabama for I imagine the freedom riders, the anti segregation movement, the humanization. I had my own feeling for Keith Jarrett that I couldn’t tell you here because that would only make you crazy. I bought the Liberation Music Orchestra for that was their apologies for the re-election of Bush. And my friend sent me this “Strange fruits”… read about it and find why I appreciate it.

So, he didn’t me bring me to the nonsense level you implied. Didn’t he tell you that we both don’t even recognize that kind of hierarchy? I thought he is your tutor, why don’t you ask him about it? Ask him about what jazz is and maybe you could grasp the ‘egalitarian’ ideas. 

Third, you just hate me so much and you didn’t know how to put me in misery, so you recklessly use that “Iwan Fals” thing to attack me. You were too late at that time, I was been in the worst place ever, so you couldn’t make anything worse for me. So your effort only made me even been assured that I have moved on. Further from I thought, away from both of you.

 to my friends who are not indonesian:

Iwan Fals, if i could analogue him…probably it’s like “Rage against the mechine” or bob marley when he sang “redemption song”. any better analogue?

~ by nisa felicia faridz on February 25, 2008.